A spoken word piece inspired by
ColdChef's post about a Slidell boy who lost his arm battling a monstrous alligator.
THE LEGEND OF DEVIN FUNCK
I ain't never known of a lad of such spunk
As the alligator fighter, young Devin Funck
Who battled a beast way down in Slidell
And Devin lost his arm, but Devin lived to tell
That in the water of Crystal Lake, lurking below
Was a half ton monster by the name of Big Joe.
He was a 12-foot lizard from his teeth to his tail
And he was spoken of in whispers down in Slidell.
But Devin had no fear and Devin he did go
Into Crystal Lake, and he faced down Big Joe.
Then the alligator lunged and the alligator bit
Into Devin's arm from his shoulder to his mitt
And he pulled at the boy and he tried to pull him down
Into Crystal Lake, where Devin he would drown
But Devin he was scrappy and Devin knew to fight
And he struck at Big Joe as Big Joe took a bite:
Devin struck him in the eye and the beast he did go
But took the boy's arm as he swam down below.
Devin called for revenge from his hospital bed
And the police told Devin that Big Joe was dead.
Devin thought a while, and then Devin said:
"It takes my arm, I take its head."
Devin looked at the stump left by the alligator
And said, "I want a robot arm like the terminator."
Lizards, if you're listening; beasts, if you can hear:
There's a killer out there that should make you slink in fear.
He's half machine and he's half Slidell punk:
He's the alligator fighter, young Devin Funck.
posted by gomichild at 6:49 PM on August 23, 2008