If You Don't Want a Razor Fight

February 12, 2009 6:23 PM

My second song for the RPM challenge, written for my horrible puppet, Sailor Martin.


So the pub is a little battered
So the bartender's arm is broke
So the jukebox has been smashed
So the kitchen's full of smoke
So there's shattered glass around you
So there's been a little scrum
If you do not want things broken
Then you shouldn't give me rum

So there are police now taking pictures
So the owner is morose
So there are women that are crying
So there are men now comatose
What do you want me to say, mate
I ain't going to express chagrin
If you do not care for blood, mate
Then you shouldn't give me gin

So there are bandages on the floor
So there's a man who will wake with scars
He'll think twice the from here on out
Who he wants to fight in bars
And any liquor at all, mate
You should know is a little risky
And if you do not want a razor fight
Then you shouldn't give me whiskey

posted by Astro Zombie (2 comments total) 1 user marked this as a favorite

Man! This reads almost like it belongs on Swordfishtrombones!
posted by Hoopo at 7:13 PM on February 12, 2009

I mean that in a good way, BTW. Not in some "I guess this guy must like Tom Waits"/Buck 65 sorta way.
posted by Hoopo at 4:59 PM on February 13, 2009

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