All I want for Christmas is......

December 17, 2010 11:46 AM

I'd like Santa to bring me: - A Revox reel-to-reel tape machine so I can master in analogue and maybe warm up that digital brittleness - even if it sounds shit, having the machine in my studio will just look soooooo cool; and - a Fender Telecaster 62 Custom Reissue in Ocean Turquoise - these have the cool edge binding but I'd dump the rosewood neck and replace with maple. What would you like Santa to bring you?
posted by MajorDundee (46 comments total) 1 user marked this as a favorite

I should have pointed out that I have it on reliable authority that Santa is not bringing me any of that stuff. The tight old bastard. It'll be socks, undercrackers and ghastly aftershave most of which will surreptitously be dropped off at a convenient charity shop early in 2011.
posted by MajorDundee at 12:16 PM on December 17, 2010


Because Santa is magic, and can do anything, I would like him to bring me perfect working knowledge of all the workings of Logic Studio. Like, in a pill I could swallow that would save me all the slow awkward "how do I do this? CAN I do this?" fumbling that annoys me so much.

Or, alternately, it could be a magic pill that would impart to me all the piano skillz I would have if I'd kept up the lessons & practicing every day since I was a kid, so I could stop having to go back and delete the wrong notes and quantize the sloppy chords, that would be cool too.
posted by dnash at 2:24 PM on December 17, 2010


I wouldn't sneeze at a nice resonator or Korg Triton, but for the first time I'm pretty satisfied with all my gear. What I really need from Santa is a vocalist who is short on promises and long on delivery.
posted by malocchio at 2:56 PM on December 17, 2010


Santa can bring me an original model of the '72 Tele Thinline reissue I'm playing now, or a really nice acoustic guitar that sounds great and is comfortable for this electric guitar guy to play. And an amp that sounds cranked but won't piss off the people in the next apartment.
posted by InfidelZombie at 4:07 PM on December 17, 2010


Here's what I'm whispering in Santa's ear as I"m sat on the old perv's knee:

-- a Dave Smith Prophet synth or maybe a Moog Slim Phatty if I haven't been quite that good. And if I've been really good... Not that I'm going techno or anything but I have a few powerpop things coming up that really need a fat synth lead.

-- While we're at it, I'll also take an Axiom Pro 61 controller keyboard, a tobacco sunburst '61 reissue Fender Jaguar

-- and if you want to stuff my stockings (missus) you can grab me pair o' these.
posted by unSane at 6:04 PM on December 17, 2010


...and of course a Martin HD-28 never goes amiss, does it?
posted by unSane at 6:06 PM on December 17, 2010


Also, I had a Revox B77 and a Teac 4-track 1/4" reel to reel about ten years ago -- both donated to me by people who no longer used them. Sadly I sold them both when I emigrated to Canada. I still have some demos I did on the 4-track and a bunch of masters on 1/4". They were both terrific machines. I could go for a B77 about now -- they are not that expensive over here.

Of course we've all forgotten how expensive 1/4" tape was...
posted by unSane at 7:21 PM on December 17, 2010


Hey, where do I get a Santa like unSane's? A mini-moog would be awesome. I used to have a rogue. I think it was about $100, maybe less, back in '82 or so. Sooo darn fun.

If i had a super-great Santa and I am ALWAYS a good boy, he'd conjure up a somewhat vintage ES-335, '70s maybe. I don't know what the color is called but it looks black until you sneak right up on it and can see the golden highlights in the wood grain. That and an equally aged Fender Twin reverb. There may be better matches for the 335, but the twins are always gonna be my fave.

I hope you guys get your teles! I'd ask for one too, but my mainstays for the last few years have been pretty "bright", an SG '61 reissue and a '65 Mustang. I'd really like to be reacquainted with the chubbier warmer tones of a 335.

(This post is gonna force me to go jam out some guitar here in a bit!!!1!
posted by snsranch at 3:39 PM on December 18, 2010


SNS, I have a translucent red 2001 335 and it is surprisingly bright on the bridge pickup. I also have a late 70s Twin but it is not a match made in heaven for the Gibson. They really seem to prefer Fender guitars.

TBH I don't use the 335 that much -- just for 70s kind of lead lines. I bought it when I was trying to teach myself to play blues, and it was good for that, but I think I'm just not a Gibson man when it comes down to it. The Tele on the bridge pickup is not a million miles from the 335.
posted by unSane at 7:11 PM on December 18, 2010


Tele on the neck pickup, I mean...
posted by unSane at 7:12 PM on December 18, 2010


Yes, unSane, it's a funny thing about being a Gibson or Fender man. I usually feel like I can be fast and loose on any given Fender, but somehow I feel a little more confident and expressive on some Gibsons.

Regarding the 335, I was in a blues phase too when I had my first, but I was also performing speed core ala DRI and whatnot at the time. So while I wasn't the coolest looking guitar player, the friggin 335 was definitely the best, most hardcore sounding thing around. Very surprising in its ability to meet many needs.
posted by snsranch at 8:45 PM on December 18, 2010


I think the 335 is a bit like a tele in that it doesn't really have a dominant personality... you absolutely have to work at it to make it sound like someting. Whereas other guitars -- the Jazzmaster I have, for example, or the Burns 12, (or a Strat, which I don't own and don't really like) have a very particular sound to them.

Most of the time I plug in my Jazzmaster and it just sounds like a guitar is supposed to sound (to me). But because of the long scale, bending strings is a PITA unless you use light strings, which go against the whole Jazzmaster Gestalt for me, so for lead lines I turn to the 335 or the Tele.

The 335 plays like butter which is I guess why you would use it for speed. I find it almost too easy to bend on... I can get two whole tones on the B and E strings without even thinking about it, which is terrific for anything with blue notes. And for phat lead lines it really rocks. But I think I like the Tele better. I've always found that Fender guitars play best with a high action, which is hell on the fingers, but there's a clarity to them I've never found with Gibsons. You always end up fighting a Fender, in my experience, but the battle is part of the sound.
posted by unSane at 9:00 PM on December 18, 2010


PS Major Dundee -- I was looking at those 62 reissue Teles and I totally TOTALLY agree about the maple neck. Which makes the whole deal kind of redundant.
posted by unSane at 9:08 PM on December 18, 2010


Interesting reading that Gibbo/Fender debate. I suppose if I was backed into a corner I'd reach for one of my Stratocasters. But, really, I tend to see guitars now as tools. The real deal - for me at least - is to know them, and know them well, and to pick the right tool for the job at hand.

Having said that, I do go through love affairs with my guitars - I'm a complete tart - where I'll play one all the time and ignore the others (unless I'm recording, when the "tool for the job" expedient kicks in). My current squeeze is a Lake Placid Blue Mexican Telecaster with a maple neck. Sure it's relatively cheap compared with a USA one, but it's a little belter and I adore it. I've never been one of those people who get hung up on "authentic" USA-made guitars or get very excited at the thought of a gen-u-ine 62 Strat or 58 Les Paul or whatever. I think there's a lot of bullshit around that "old guitars are better" thing. Basically you can either play or you can't - and an authentic 50's guitar ain't gonna change that one little bit. Always seems to me that there's an inverse relationship between ability to actually play the fucking thing and the degree of trainspotting anorak mentality that accompanies guitar fetishism. But that's just my opinion (humble as ever, huh? :-)) )

Anyway - I'll be uploading a Christmas challenge track later on today probably, and that has my wee Tele doing her stuff.
posted by MajorDundee at 5:45 AM on December 19, 2010


Just to qualify that last one a little. I'd completely concede that there may be something to be said for older semi's or acoustic guitars where the maturation of the wood can affect the tone. But when your talking about a 2" thick slab of mahogany (e.g. a Les Paul) - I fail to see how the age of the wood (i.e. 90%+ of the composition of a guitar) can have any material effect on the sound. It's more likely to be the winding of the pick-ups etc than anything else. And, of course, the psychology around "Wow, I'm playing a 58 Les Paul so it must sound good......and, fuck me, so it does!!".
posted by MajorDundee at 5:56 AM on December 19, 2010


Yeah, I think it's mostly in the pickups (and neck a bit) for solid bodies. I used to have a MIJ Jazzmaster which always sounded horrible to me -- totally shrill -- the pickups were voiced totally differently to the real thing. I dropped in some Seymour Duncans and it was fine.

Those Mex Teles have really good pickups I think. They're a bit hotter than the US version but they are voiced really well. I'm not sure they jingle jangle in quite the same way but I'm quibbling.
posted by unSane at 8:35 AM on December 19, 2010


My Mex jingles and jangles just fine. I have a US Tele as well - I prefer the Mex one, but I think it's more because I prefer maple fingerboards (the US one has rosewood) rather than tonal differences - I haven't actually A/B'd them though....must do that.

I want to be clear about what I was saying about guitar trainspotters. I certainly wasn't putting any of my MeFiMu friends - includng you and sns - in that category (just in case anyone has taken offence). I think you all know what I'm getting at there in any event. It's one thing being keen on guitars as a player, quite another just being a sort of voyeur or, worse, an investor with absolutely no music in them at all.
posted by MajorDundee at 10:51 AM on December 19, 2010


I MacGuyvered my mex tele with a Bigsby which changed it a bit so that probably accounts for the differences.

I'm not a guitar sniffer at all -- most times I prefer to play a new guitar to an old one! But I've never had a feeling of total one-ness with a guitar and I suppose I'm always looking for that. I always think the action could be a bit lower or the pickup a bit brighter or SOMETHING. So I tinker endlessly trying to get them set u just-so... and of course they never are.
posted by unSane at 12:11 PM on December 19, 2010


You saying "MacGuyvered" reminds me of a weird phrase I saw someone using in a post on here the other day. The guy said he was (or maybe wasn't) "jonesing" something. Wha??

Made me lol calling someone a "guitar sniffer" - I'll have to remember that one, it's spot on! I know what you mean about the search for the perfect guitar. Holy Grail, gold at the end of the whatsit etc.
posted by MajorDundee at 12:27 PM on December 19, 2010


Brand New Jones
posted by Zenabi at 12:36 PM on December 19, 2010


Thanks Zenabi - I think I get it now (it's a euphemism for wanking/jerking off right?). Quite like that band btw - although in the UK "thick" is often used to mean "stupid" as in "thick in the head". So not the greatest choice of band name if you're looking for global domination then.....
posted by MajorDundee at 12:46 PM on December 19, 2010


A jones is what an addict gets when he hasn't had his fix.
posted by unSane at 12:57 PM on December 19, 2010


... and you jones for something. Or have a jones for something. Usually a terrible one. It's like unrequited love, plus addiction, plus being very hungry, all at the same time.
posted by unSane at 12:59 PM on December 19, 2010


In the old days, in photography, there was a certain class of amateur who was only concerned with how 'tight' the grain was or how sharp the image, and they were renowned for taking extraordinarily dull photographs. We called them 'grain-sniffers' because whenever you handed them a photograph, rather than looking at it as a picture in its own right, they would immediately put it right to their nose to see how sharp it was and what the grain looked like.

"Fucking grain sniffers".

So that's where guitar-sniffer comes from...
posted by unSane at 3:34 PM on December 19, 2010


Santa could bring me an extra 8 hours each day, and I would be insanely happy.

There isn't really much gear I lust after (maybe a ride cymbal, and a less muddy distortion pedal than the Russian Big Muff), because I have room full of instruments. I just don't know how to play them at the level I'd like to be able to play them. I would spend that extra 8 hours mastering those instruments and writing music. (In theory)
posted by baxter_ilion at 6:15 PM on December 19, 2010


I would look at the ProCo Rat if you want something less muddy. I've used a ton of other disto pedals but this is the only one I've ever really loved. Guitar Rig has a good emulation of it in the Rat. I like it best dialled right down. As a bonus it has a true bypass so when it's off it's really off. Every guitar sound on all of my tracks (apart from the totally clean or acoustic ones) has gone through this.
posted by unSane at 8:06 PM on December 19, 2010


Love the sounds you are getting from the ProCo Rat. I always subconsciously associated the name with RATT - which they are... not the sound I'm looking for. :) I'll have to check it out.
posted by baxter_ilion at 8:36 PM on December 19, 2010


The RAT really excels at chordal chunk, whereas most other pedals seem oriented around lead sounds. It will do great lead sounds as well, but what I like about it is that if you dial the distortion right down and fiddle around with the filter setting, you can get a sound which has lots of bottom end thump but still some clarity up top.

Don't get sucked into the vintage RAT maelstrom: the RAT2 that you can buy for $65 is top notch.
posted by unSane at 8:43 PM on December 19, 2010


I know that you guys are hard-core hardware nuts, but I can heartily recommend Mokafix Audio's distortion FX pedal emulations. They are simply fantastic (and currently cheapo), and I am reliably informed by my *serious* guitarist mates that they are damn close to the originals.

In terms of for me, I asked Santa for snow for Christmas, and look what happened!
posted by the_very_hungry_caterpillar at 9:23 AM on December 20, 2010


I forgot, that what I really, really want is a new tenor saxophone - a Conn "Chu Berry" or Buescher Aristocrat (or, I'll take a Selmer Mark VI in a pinch :D )

Those FX pedal emulations sound pretty good in the demos I hear - looks like they aren't available anymore, though, except the free ones. Do you know how you would record guitar for those? Would you record the guitar direct in, and then apply the effects? or record the amp with a mic then apply effects?
posted by baxter_ilion at 10:09 AM on December 20, 2010


Oh, you don't know me, I'm a plugin junkie. What Santa is actually bringing me for xmas is this. Those FX look awesome.
posted by unSane at 10:09 AM on December 20, 2010


In terms of for me, I asked Santa for snow for Christmas, and look what happened!
Absolutely. Brits are always wishing for that elusive White Christmas and then moaning when they get the usual rainy gloom. Well, we have a total fucking monster one now - and the country's in meltdown (a rather inappropriate metaphor, I grant you). It's hilarious! "Be careful what you wish for" - quite so.

Just thought I'd add my usual opinionated and provocative shit to the discussion re pedals etc. I've said most of this before. I gave them up years ago. Can't beat hot valves (tubes) - nothing comes close in my book, and you don't want anything messing with that sound. The less intereference or intervention between your guitar and what comes out of the speakers, the better. The only other stuff I generally use is a touch of reverb and a little compression (ok, ok, unS - I know compression is omnipresent like God) at the mastering stage.

Always seemed to me that pedals muddied up the sound - added a sort of gloop and a lot of noise - and kind of made you sound like everyone else. They seem somehow to work against getting an individual sound. I wouldn't die in a ditch defending that particular point btw - and it's probably more relevant with modulation effects like chorus etc. But just keeping things nice and simple allows, counter-intuitively perhaps, a kind of freedom - just you, the guitar and the amplifier.

I don't expect anyone to agree with any of that btw - just provoking discussion in a light-hearted way. I'm simply describing the place I've arrived at after playing electric guitars for 30-odd years. Next time you plug in just give it a go for a few minutes - cut out all the pedals and plug-ins and other crap and just work with the amp. Get to know it better, get to know your guitar better. Once you know how to coax the best out of both of them, maybe then you can start experimenting with pedals. But you'll have the cart and the horse in the right place. Try it - you might be pleasantly surprised.......
posted by MajorDundee at 10:16 AM on December 20, 2010


I mostly agree with you actually, Major. I only use the RAT because neither of my amps have a master volume (which I hate anyway) and if I'm recording when the family is home, well, you get it.

About 90% of my stuff is still done with Guitar Rig, to be honest, just because I can do it without driving the family bonkers. I use the Fender Twin simulation with the 'Cat' (=RAT) pedal in front of it, and sometimes the AC30 for the 12-string. It doesn't sound like the real thing on its own but in my busy mixes the difference vanishes. I don't think it would suit your stylings at all, though, where the guitar is more exposed.

It has one big advantage over the real twin when it comes to vibrato as the vib on mine is really noisy, sounds like an old man sleeping poorly.

I cannot write songs using the amp sims at all though. That requires either an acoustic, or an electric, plugged or unplugged. I really should try to record using the amps more but like I say it would drive everyone, not just me, unSane.
posted by unSane at 10:29 AM on December 20, 2010


Do you know how you would record guitar for those? Would you record the guitar direct in, and then apply the effects? or record the amp with a mic then apply effects?

You would generally use those by recording the guitar into the computer clean, then putting the FX in as an insert, then sending it to an amp sim like Guitar Rig or Amplitube, and monitoring the output as you play (which is how I generally work).

If you wanted to use them with a real amp you'd have to re-amp the signal, which is something of a pain as you have to take the computer output and match it to the impedance of a real amp. There are boxes you can buy to do this but it all gets a bit complicated.
posted by unSane at 10:34 AM on December 20, 2010


I want you.
I want you so bad.
I want you.
I want you so bad.
It's driving me mad.
It's driving me mad.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 5:30 AM on December 21, 2010


You'll get hairs on your palms Flapjax..........Dr Dundee advises that you leave your strumstick alone for a wee while.
posted by MajorDundee at 9:58 AM on December 21, 2010


OK, Dundee, I'll unhand the strumstick for a while, but... I'm still gonna keep my skillet good and greasy.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 4:14 PM on December 21, 2010


Can't beat hot valves (tubes) - nothing comes close in my book, and you don't want anything messing with that sound. The less intereference or intervention between your guitar and what comes out of the speakers, the better.

i agree and disagree - it depends on what you're after

i live in an apartment and can't go the tube amp route due to neighbors who wouldn't appreciate me rocking out - therefore, i use digital simulations like the boss gt-8 - they record well - and i've found that distortion pedals, real or gt-8 emulated, are something that one has to be very careful with - too much is a huge tone-suck - but sometimes, a little goes a long way

on the other hand, if one is after non-traditonal, abrasive, weird sounds, an arsenal of pedals is a must - there are times when i want to screw it all up - and there are other times when i want to play it straight

it's been my experience that out of a scale of 100 - distortion pedals only work well for me under 50% and sometimes a lot less - at times i've gone down to 10 or even 5

i've been wondering what the new vox valvetronix amps might do for me, though - one can set the power dial at 1 or 2 watts and dial in a nice breakup tone with real valve tone

it's tempting
posted by pyramid termite at 10:19 PM on December 22, 2010


Fair comment re horses for courses, pt. And it is kinda difficult to get weird sounds with a very stripped down setup but, in those circs, it's up to you and what you play and how you play it. It's a challenge. It might not sound weird, but harmonically it could be very weird indeed.....

I think you'll find - you'll know this anyway - there's quite a few smallish combo amps around that you can run at various power levels -anywhere between 15 and 100w (I think some of the Mesa range can do that, for instance). I totally get you re not waking the neighbours. But, here again, there are loads of small tube or modified valve (tube) amps that you can get a good sound out of at comparatively low volume. So long as you have a master volume control on the amp you can run those valves pretty hot and not break the windows.........
posted by MajorDundee at 2:03 AM on December 23, 2010


I'm still gonna keep my skillet good and greasy

Now, That's What I Call Genuinely Nauseating (:-))
posted by MajorDundee at 2:05 AM on December 23, 2010


My city-apartment room is pretty much full with my tele, u2, acoustic, ukulele, and keyboard, but boy do I need to get a real-life bass guitar one of these days. A vintage bronco would do jusst fine. (but, nah, I've been lucky enough this year. I don't need any more possessions. plus a micron's bass sounds are doable.)
posted by tmcw at 5:56 PM on December 23, 2010


I used to have a Squier P-Bass but it wasn't that awesome... kind of weedy pickups. I sold it when I left England and when I got to Canada I bought a Peavey BXP, which is terrific and much, much better than the Squier.
posted by unSane at 7:50 PM on December 23, 2010


Now, That's What I Call Genuinely Nauseating

Hmm... perhaps they don't use cast iron skillets for cooking up that fine English cuisine you folks are noted for over there on your little island? Cause if they did, you'd surely know that you've got to keep it greasy, or your eggs are gonna stick, and your bacon's gonna burn.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 1:58 AM on December 24, 2010


You're talking to a Scotsman here Flapjax - and what we don't know about grease just ain't worth knowing. I mean, we even deep fry Mars Bars*. Life expectancy is a little curtailed, but, hey, we're happy....

* you may be unfamiliar with that particular high-calorie slab of chocolate, caramel and fudge - it's like a Snickers bar minus the nuts. As you will be if there's any more of them thar incineratin' remarks about the cookery of, to quote the bard, this septic isle...;-)
posted by MajorDundee at 11:01 AM on December 24, 2010


I'm a big fan of British food. Conceptually anyway. Haggis and jam roly poly, washed down with a pint of London Pride, and a Chicken Jalfrezi to go.
posted by unSane at 1:39 PM on December 24, 2010


well, i got myself a used squier 5 string standard p bass special, made in korea in 1989 and strung with flatwounds - it has a standard p bass pickup in the neck and a j bass pickup in the bridge - aside from being deeper than hell, it's got that thump, thanks to the p bass pickup - the j bass pickup is just kind of so so - but like the guy said, it's old school and sounds like it

this gas thing never stops, does it?
posted by pyramid termite at 7:13 PM on December 31, 2010


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