Ugly Monster

October 24, 2008 8:41 PM

Inspired by those grotesque masks.

I felt this Halloween thing ought to rock, and the distorted bass and electric piano were a departure for me. Special thanks to Jenna for the other lead vocal part; she was in the midst of producing The Art of Murder at a local theater and took time out to help me make the "deadline".


Ugly Monster

I’m a monster, my face is lumpy
There’s a lopsided hump on my back
I only have a single eyeball
I ate the other one for a snack

My hair is long and kind of stringy
Do I need a new conditioner or mousse?
Now, listen here, forget my hair!
It’s Halloween and this monster is on the loose!

Honey, bring my axe and stein
I won’t be drinking beer or wine
There’s a full moon tonight, and I want to slaughter
Anybody’s son or daughter

Darling, you look hideous this evening
Where did you get that awful smell, it’s swell!
Take me in your arms, you ugly monster
You know I’m not the type to bite and tell!

The fun and games can wait ‘til midnight
We’ll go out to our favorite crypt -
But now, luck willin’ I’ll do some killin’
Save your lovin’ ‘til some limbs are ripped

Cause I’m a monster, a scary monster
I only come out once a year
And if I show up on your doorstep
Don’t give me candy, run away with fear!

I’m a monster! A monster! A big scary, cyclops of a monster!
Yes, I’m a monster! Glad to meet you! A monster! Gonna eat you!
Come on honey, knock it off, I'm tryin' to scare people here.
Oops - some of the pus from my scar got on your cheek. Want me to lick it off for you? Look, I gotta go - the other monsters will make fun of me...

posted by AppleSeed (2 comments total) 1 user marked this as a favorite

Fabulous! An instant classic! Jenna's vox bring it into the realm of hilarious perfection.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 3:34 AM on October 25, 2008

Oh man, it's musical theater meets horror: my two secret weaknesses (let's keep that between us). This is so silly-awesome.
posted by uncleozzy at 6:11 AM on October 27, 2008

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