Cross the 6s

The same old story. Boy meets girl. Boy seduces girl. Girl does one better and seduces the boy. In this case the boy is the Devil hisself.

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posted by quadog (3 comments total)

I think this has potential.

I like the guitar, simple, straight-ahead. Very well done.

The effects on the vocals don't work, in my opinion. If you're going to have that kind of heavy effect, then you need to add a buzzing electric guitar or something to help offset it. The contrast between the pure thin guitar and the overprocessed voice was interesting for about 10 seconds, then just turned distracting.

I also think you need to be more free with the performance of the vocals. There's some awkward phrasings in there, but don't worry about it. Don't try to make them fit the rhythm, it doesn't sound right. I mean, come on, like The Devil is gonna sing by the rules??

I think instead of the vocal processing, you should turn the mic way up, get right up on it, and be very soft and intimate with the mic. I think a strong presence, a feeling of the vocals being right next to your head, but no effects, that would work, and work well.
posted by Ynoxas at 5:09 PM on August 12, 2007

Thanks for the thoughtful critique. I agree with everything you're saying. This is actually the first song I've written/recorded (and the first I've posted) so I need the feedback. The vocals are admittedly a little stilted. I'm laying down a guitar track and then laying down a separate vocal track - which feels a little strange because I'm used to singing and playing at the same time. But this will have to do until I decide to get more than one mic. The vocal processing stuff is just me being a kid in a candy store after I discovered all the affects that Garageband has. I was hoping to get some kind of Black Keys affect but it doesn't blend well with the naked guitar sound. Again, thanks for taking the time to offer some good advice. I'll try a second take.
posted by quadog at 10:00 AM on August 13, 2007

This is great for a first effort!

My opinion is just that, my opinion, but I'm happy to share it with you. Remember I'm starting from the vantage point of "I like this".

I really like the prospects of this song.

Have fun with it.

Post the follow up here on MeMu when finished! Posting the lyrics is also always appreciated.
posted by Ynoxas at 3:24 PM on August 13, 2007